Friday, September 24, 2010

Long Live Comedy @ The Dog and Parrot 28th September 2010

A quiet night saw Sean Turner making his Mc debut; along side Howard Lee as part of our multi compare experiment. WD40 came up in conversation, always creeps up on you that one. The second week of our new lights and new mic, just the stand to come next week! James Christopher kicked off the acts back from Edinburgh. Some old and new stuff from the llc regular. We even had a scientist in the audience on a science themed night (which most acts completely ignored as usual.) Paul Gerrard was second with his witty gems. James Tilman closed the first half with talk of family vales and coming from Yorkshire, he looks like a certain bald celebrity slated by Eminem a few years ago. Edgy stuff indeed.

Howard was mc-ing the second half, taking to it like a duck to slightly tapid water. Howard introduced the first act in this section the infamous Dr Carlos, which he introduced as ‘socially defunct’. This was an accurate description as he proceeded to talk about looking like a gay stalky weirdo murder. With other material including dressing as Freddy Kruger. His next appearance at Long Live Comedy will be much anticipated. Nat Wicks. Her first gig, she’s from Middlesbrough not that she’s proud of it! Cyber bully effected her as if coming from Boro wasn’t enough! She talked about the dreaded no2 on a virgin train and inevitable problems that occur. Confidently delivered. Howard then eased the audience into the competition with the promise of chocolates. Six goodies, with six clues to name the band, based on a conversation full of clues, very uplifting and amusing.

Rich Pullen closed the night with material about the back of the stage and seemingly free flowing observations of the night. Thanked people for picking the club over the temptation of seeing Micheal Bubble or Basshunter. Looking very much like a young Rufus Hound. Vibrant and enthusiastic, looking solid even in this early stage of his stand up ‘career’. Even talked about the random guy outside the Switzerland Super Kaleida Another fun night at the D + P.

LLC @ the dog and parrot

Sep. 21st 2010. - Relaunch (sort of)

The first review in ages! Last week the show was cancelled for the second time in our 4 year history. The first time the pub ran out of beer, so not our fault. But last week non-appearnace of comics and audience made us pull it again. Instead all the regulars decended to the D&P to discuss ways to make it better. (And thrash Barry at pool.)

So here it was- our first new improved (well, gradually improving)comedy night. We had new blinding stage lights making the performers all sweaty, new music, a photographer taking decent photos, a good crowd and some good acts.

First up was local legend Gav Webster gracing our humble stage to try out some new material- a top start to the night. Professional number two Dan Willis also got up with some new notes balanced by a few tried and tested gags.

Among the emerging acts was Sean Turner with his now legendary IMMORTALITY BOX routine- I won't explain any more, just try to see it. Tom Tolston (looking like an ALDI De Niro)entertained us with life as a mature student- going to ironic 80's discos when you still have flashbacks from the real thing. Adam Lumley provided some local flavour with comments on metro travel and glaxy radio. Simon Buglass finished the night fighting against predjudice towards the bigger boned man. Simon started on our stage exactly one year ago and since then he's started his own night and played at the edinburgh fringe- another comedy flower grown in the manure of Long Live comedy.

George Zach was tonights compere holding it all together, and we had a rare appearance by Al Key who stepped up for 2 minutes and told 5 jokes. But one was the best joke we've heard all year, so job done.

The night ended with our take on 'Just a Minute' the radio 4 panel show. A podcast of that is coming soon. For more photos see our facebook page. (see above)

LLC @ the dog and parrot

31st August

Dan Willis was back Mcing, back from Edinburgh festival from his popular Jocks and Geordies gig to a somewhat more intimate crowd. He did a good job relaxing the audience into it, like a true pro (well he is a pro!). Callums naked modelling days were addressed, which is hard to forget for anyone who’s heard about them before. The first act on was a guy who’s probably played first in the club more than any other act Paul Gerrard, with some new material that delighted. I wrote LLC’s most prolific ginger instead of gigger (that merit would likely be John Smith). Canny observations and zaniness. Howard Lee next up debonair, punchy and lightening quick one liners, trying new material. Ian Edhouse next with tales on the LLC toilets and education. He’s a self confessed geek, stating as you get older your standards enviably drop.

Dan was back after the break commenting on the paper stuck to the microphone (classy and professional are we!) Pete Thompson up next with songs about his baby and his jam cover all on the wonderful musical instrument that is the DS! Sean Turner up next with his surreal ness. Finally Chris Cross was headlining off of Britain’s Got Talent and that. Talked about some weird things like sex with animals, darkness and weirdness. Looks a bit like Russell Brand. He performed some contortion by having back boobs and dislocating his shoulder and showing up the results. Strange, but enchanting. One of the oddest nights as LLC for sure.

LLC @ the dog and parrot

24th August

Joe Mclachlan was Mc tonight. Don’t mention football he hates it. He probed the crowd like a veteran I think It was his first time mc-ing the night though. Up first was George back from Edinburgh was looking very debonair. Working the stage with animal sex stories. Sharon Race with some material was the next comedy fodder. Parties for the sake of parties and love of fat food were topics she mulled over. The best things life are free the veteran club performer wailed over, some very good stuff from Sharon. John Thornley next an ex accountant doing new material, puny tales from suburbia. Wacky and off the wall humour. Awkwardly weird off beat ideas.

BUBBA LAHZI – An older South African gent I hope he won’t mind me saying, political satire from the outsider point of view, interesting. Andy Clarke next he has his glasses on so he can see our beady eyes. He shared his chocolates (I won’t ruine his expensive joke) Talked about his last gig and having a sensitive operation (something up his arse). Did a nice impression of a tea pot. Sharpe, quick and very witty, working as a carer another flow of consciousness.

John – new to the club looking beyond his years with a beard and moustache, He’s a film student who farts in relationships. Finishing up was Jack Norris with his 1st gig. Showed promise. Joe ended the night talking about his girlfriend snoring.

LLC @ the dog parrot

27th July

Callum was the MC for the first time in an age! Looking very debonair, he told tales of being a postie. Paul Gerrard was the first act up on stage, with his usual quick fire rug pulling. People breaking into your house was an amusing tale. Kevin Wilkinson up next with some new stuff. Family talk. Looking very youthful out of his work clothes. Callum came back on with masturbation stories. Phil Harker may double up as a Chesney Hawks look-alike. Good use of language, Warm, colourful and vibrant. Did a good impression of a Hippo and some good word play.

Callum back up after the break talking about racism in comedy. Billy Bob Thornton up next who looks cannily like club co founder Pete Thompson. Very wordy with cowboy ness country tracks and a song about his girl. Skilfully mulled over his mistakes like an art form. Jesus is watching ya! Andy Clark up next, who has come straight out of hospital for the gig, like a trooper. His first time at LLC and 2nd gig I believe. Mixed the legal drugs with his special drugs a total string of consciousness in his act, very flowing. Potentially Geordie comedy gold. Poked fun at someone called DR Carlos, never heard of him. Gavin Webster like, something about wasp Nazis at the end. Callum ended on a Wisk joke. Fun times!

LLC @ the dog and parrot

13th July

George was back Mcing Bear ribbing and dicking about on stage. Up first was Pete Thompson with his musictastic DS songsmithness. Tune tonight was “ladies”. Annoyance based banter and another song with musical puns. Good stuff. Christian Steel up next, putting on an impromptu performance, being dragged up by George no doubt. He talked about living in London, dressed very dapper with a string of consciousness style, unmatched. Like child hyperactivity applied to adulthood.

In the second section George returned heckling the crowd, like you do. His wing man story came up again. Ben Messenger was up next, name based comedy, he was wearing particularly dark clothing for the summer, but hey sometimes you want to stand out. Only his 2nd gig, his wit was very dry and shows great potential. Dave Nitcheze next talking joblessness, porn, dry and stylishly dressed with snappy one liners. Also talked Adverts and jobs, great vocal tone, definitely one to watch.

George was back with vengeance in the third section arguing about something (can’t read my writing again durrr). Sean Turner was next, actor extraordinaire with surreal comedy, flights of fantasy, metro fair dodging stories and other anecdotes. Very eccentric. Alistaire Greeves up last with a self depreciating style. Lovable loser with a witty banter. George ended on a Sarah Jessica Parker joke the poor woman, as if it isn’t bad enough looking like a horse. Great night!

LLC @ the dog and parrot

June 29th 2010

Mc was again Dan Willis this week as he opened up with some club news two of the regular comedians had been taken to the hospital in the same night, catastophrophy indeed. He also noted someone in the crowd was pregnant so it could become three hospitalised. Phil Harker came up first, likeable character with some animal impressions, a bit like Russell Howard, but without the bong eyes. He talked about gyming it up, something more of us should be doing looking around Newcastle! Adam Lumley next up. Looking smart in an army like jacket, he’s another wrestler (the clubs full of them!). Loud and confrontational, did some Jade Goody material, I Phone and politics related jokes. Paulo De La Cruz next with Latin comedy looked very familiar. Gave some englishisms and performed a song about trusers.

Dan was talking childbirth again according to my notes for ages! We learnt more than we wanted to about child birth that night! Ian Todd was next up with randomness, wearing a star wars T-Shirt which is very Ian (I know I’m fascinated with T-Shirts Alright!). He was bantering about swimming pools, dogging and dating classifieds. Some Dan and George banter ensued as is traditional for the club. Bob Graham up next a Scottish comedian who will do anything for beer apparently. Clever word plays and talked about living in Australia. Another gig and month over!

LLC @ the dog and parrot

June 22nd 2010

Even George back to Mcing duties, with his usual Greek banter. He even has his own mc-ing catchphrase now “I don’t know where I’m going with this”. First act up was regular MC Dan Willis noting Georges sexual exploits or lack of. Being a lucky sex charm and getting in trouble with the boyfriend of a lover. Paul Gerrard next with punchy jokes and incest (jokes not actually incest). George gives sex advice and Lee Kyle is the final act before the break with his flag trivia, amusing flag based jokes which was a truly flagtastic display.

Up after the break was Kai’s Edinburgh preview show exclusive to LLC. Kai made a reference to George being deported I couldn’t possibly comment. Evolution is the name of his show; he talked also about bathroom etiquette and relationships. Stories about educating his girlfriend, Geordie stereotypes, his brother and lap dancing were all hilarious. He apologised for the roughness of his show, but this was true raw power. More stories about the revenge of the airbag, the evolution of dogs, visual toilet humour and the perils of massage. An action packed evening with a nice healthy crowd, I really enjoyed it!

LLC @ dog and parrot

June 15th 2010

Dan Mcing for the second week in a row so more ribbing of the last Mc before him Even George Zach. Dan also talked about being an uncle and weddings. The first act up was Alan Fletcher, talking about where he’s from, self depreciation and growing up in Northern Ireland. Quick witted with clever stories. James Christopher up next with stories of childhood bullying and Woody Allen-esque delivery. Quick witty, very puny with a shotgun style for one liners. George tried to chip in with one of his jokes, suffice to say, it didn’t help. James was trying out some new stuff, ending on a good footy joke.

John Thornley stepped in as a replacement to a guy who didn’t show. He did some impressions and talked supermarkets, but it was a tough crowd tonight. His style is somewhat ranty and feels like a flow of consciousness. Pete Thompson did a song about being a dad and his jam parody all on his DS, top notch stuff.

Rich Pullen with his 4th gig, heckled by George, he can’t keep stum! He talked about young people failing, vuvuelas and made a reference to the awkwardness of his own name. Another jolly night had by all accounts.

LLC @ dog and parrot

June 1st 2010

Dan Willis was back to reclaim his thrown as LLC MC that’s a mouthful! Lots of audience banter ensued as usual, then he introduced the first act of the night Chris Errington, with his regular material, politics and porn utensils (don’t ask!), bright and quirky comedy as we’ve come to expect from him. James Beck next, He’s from Leeds bright and vibrant set, talking religion and various other subjects. Like Michael McIntyre with a filthy mouth.

Dawn? next talking about internet proposals. Phil Golder Talking about that hot topic of the day the habits of giants. The awkwardness of being a man and jobs.

After another break Dan was telling a story about the time he met Cheryl Tweedy’s brother and the unfortunate resulting incidents. Up next was Carlos with a weird performance of mainly new material. Dan talked more about hecklers and a squaddie tale. Beth Anderson up next who Dan didn’t realise was an act and was ribbing earlier. Looking very sassy with a Sandy from Greece look on the bottom and a camouflage top. Speech therapy stories, hen dos and marriage tales ensued, very amusing, though she sways a lot like a ship in a wavy dock yard.

Rich Pullen next his 2nd gig ever, which when witnessing the polished ness and confidence of his act is surprising. He talked about politics and school days. Nice spinal tap T-shirt to boot. Al Key up next with one quick and effective joke. Even George up next, the occasional sound man sticking to what he does best. Eurovision, stories of priests setting up comedy clubs and his last date and the morning after. Another night of zany dog and parrot hilarity.

LLC @ dog and parrot

May 18th 2010

George in for Dan again, he’s starting to expect this now! He talked about local dialects especially for the north east! Chris Errington up first, talking partners, haircuts, songs and TV. Half of the duo pirate chat, very surreal comedy, but also very funny. Eddie French up next talked about warm up exercises, looking like Elvis on steroids. Talked pop music, solid performance.

After the break George talks about coming to England. Phil Golder talked old friends, Thai brides, Tesco's in Thailand, with controversial comedic views, AIDS, Political stuff and Paedophilia scare mongering. Tim Strange up next with a batman T-Shirt this week, talking Dutch, having a girlfriend, wanking and getting drunk through peer pressure, dry but very witty.

John Baker was doing Jeremy Kyle stuff, benefit cheats, the government, darkness, tracksuits and McIntyre-isms. A thus ended another random bout of giggles at the dog and parrot.

Long Live Comedy @ the Dog and Parrot May 11th 2010

Long Live Comedy @ the Dog and Parrot May 11th 2010

George back Mcing again. He’s getting good at this compare malarkey even if sometimes he is a bit hard to understand! (Not my words!) Paul Gerrard up first, who to my knowledge MCs apart, has played more gigs in the club than anyone (expect maybe Sharon Race, but its close at least!). He did his hits and I think he used some music for a change, maybe he didn’t but that’s all I can deceiver from my notes!

After the break was John Thornley, with an interesting stance, don’t laugh at me, it was his first ever gig. He did some TV themed material and some impressions as well. Funny, but with a rather un comfortable section about Geordies own Heather Mills. Other brave subjects were approached especially considering it was his first gig; he also had some good rants in there for extra measure. Howard Lee up next with some new stuff and stuff I can’t read in my notes (sorry Howard!). Jared Jess Cooke up next with new stuff, Australia and daft laws and traffic parties.

Long Live Comedy @ the Dog and Parrot May 4th 2010

Long Live Comedy @ the Dog and Parrot

May 4th 2010


George was Mcing this fine night; He’d just done a charity gig so was full of new stories of more women finding him attractive (presumably because he is Greek). Texting a girl in the same room as himself in a forbidden love type style, weird but interesting.

Ryan Brown was the first guy up tonight, new to the club. He’s from Burnley and served up some punchy puny one liners and fast. George had more talk about being a slag and next up was Sean Turner, with weird and surreal word games, had slashes on his T-shirt looking quite scary. He told stories of misspent youth. Rob Gilroy next, no show or so we thought!

Up after the first break, George back to his old ways chatting up an American girl in the audience. Rob Gilroy came on as character Johnny Rocket. With themes of law and order, health and safety, as a security guard. His tag line being that of the clichéd , crime doesn’t pay, although this really worked well with his stage persona. Richard Wells up next, a big man, with a big heart, talked about his aspirations and the dirty habits of the romans.

Sean Gorman up next talking about age, the etiquette of talking to grannies and hotel sex etiquette. High energy as usual from Sean. Tim Strange up next looking really exotic with a fiery t-shirt drawing attention to his impressive frame, looking like an American footballer. (mind you he is a wrestler!) Took to his first gig in the club really well. He talked about the decline in the efforts in relationships and shows a lot of promise for the future. Dickie Gardner was up next after his triumphant full set last week. He looked special with a girly headband and his arm finally out of a sling. He talked about politics and mainly did new stuff. Another jolly week at LLC.